19. OCTOBER BREAST CANCER AWARENESS MONTH- Ramblings
WARNING: This edition is rambling thoughts. Read with caution.
It is October. And on October 21 it was Five Months since my breasts became a memory. Double mastectomy took them. And yes, October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Rest assured, I am aware.
I went to the Pink Soiree to kick-off the Breast Cancer Awareness month. Some knew my story. Some did not. Some didn’t want to hear the story. And a few had the look “I am here to support the cause only—I don’t want to catch what you had.” Ok, that was an exaggeration. Besides you cannot catch cancer. Can you? I am not sure on that as the genetic testing said I did not have the BRACCA genes.
In addition to this month of October, I see Pink drinks in every bar I go to . . . .ok. . . .one bar. . . .but it is close to home.
So what was the roller coaster ride that was the first five months?
At first, it was amazing to me that when you receive the diagnosis, how many women came out of the woodwork saying: “I had breast cancer.” “I Had a lumpectomy.” “I don’t have my boobs, lost them years ago.” Each one ready to share their experiences and offer help. And some shared their words of wisdom:
Just think, maybe you can get that two piece bathing suit half price.
Well, you won’t have that income from Playboy anymore.
Reconstruction—you can have a 44DDDD
At least now, when you drop food it won’t land on your shirt it will go straight to your lap harder to see with the table in front of you.
How will you hold up your towel?
Just think –you will lose weight
When you have that MRI—it is LOUD! Take music.
Lets get the friends together and have drinks fun and frolic. . .oh yes, can you drink? (as if that is a question)
Oh, and by the way, if you need anything—an ear, a walk, food, a friend, call me.
There is also the reality.
We wanted more children, but I could not because of the medication I was on afterwards. (This was not a problem for me—had a hysterectomy many years ago.)
The waiting is the worst. YES it was! Waiting for results. Waiting in the waiting room of the numerous doctor visits. Waiting for the drains to be removed. Waiting for the Lab results after the surgery. WAITING WAITING WAITING
Don’t let your brain race into the dark zone ruminating over every little thing such as when you get a blister on your toe and you think has the cancer returned?
At each meeting with the surgeon, oncologist, nurse, tech, consult, test, results, --take someone with you. Your mind is reeling, you need someone to take notes and listen. (It turns out these people are always welcome—and asked if they have questions as well)
The MRI was loud. And I cried the entire time.
The drains were the worst part the first few days after surgery.
Just one step at a time—you can do it!
There will be drains. You will have a class on how to empty them.
Take Showers –they are good.
Is it ok if you are tired to ask people not to visit right how? Or to say, I am tired and need to rest? OF COURSE! You are healing! Honesty is important.
Oh, and by the way, if you need anything—an ear, a walk, food, a friend, call me.
You may have noticed a theme: If you need anything call me. That has become my mantra. If you need anything, call me. I pay it forward. What these strong ladies. . .these heroes – have taught me in five months is YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
Yes, I had a great Post Op visit, no chemo, no radiation. No pills. I still tire easily. Three months after surgery, I took a cross county trip—Pennsylvania to California—to assist my baby as she relocated. One stop--We were in Arizona exploring a cave that gave its description: Five steps up, 122 steps down.
The cave was beautiful. The Navajo Tour Guide great. Instead of returning the way we came (It was flat) The 5 steps up turned out to be large rocks pretty steep to get out of the cave. Ok, I can do that. There were little rocks to hold an balance.
Now to get to the 122 steps down. That turned out to be a 1 mile walk up hill in sand to get to the iron walkfor the final steeper climb to the top of the hill and the 122 iron steps down the side of the hill—in 104 degree desert heat. I did make it to the iron walkway that took you the final few feet up to the crest of the hill to the walkway across to the 122 steps. My daughter staying with me and asking if I was ok. We were way behind the group. A couple who were on the walkway, turned and saw us below. Turned out they were a doctor and nurse from Virginia on vacation. They came to my rescue.
DOC “Are you ok? Do you need water? Do you have water?”
ME: Yes—back in the bus.
DOC: Let’s stand here and you take some slow breathes, and we will help you back. You do not walk much? This was too hard for you?
ME: “I used to walk a lot. But about two months ago I had a double mastectomy and just started returning to normal life.”
DOC: “Why the hell are you here? Are you nuts?”
The couple remained with me down the steps and to the bus. I thanked them profusely—and still do. Yes, I am nuts. Just ask my family and friends.
So in the last few months, I pay it forward. Women, some I know and some I do not, have come into my circle, have heard about me. I offer: if you need anything—an ear, a walk, food, a friend, call me. They have.
And Yes, it is OCTOBER-- BREAST CANCER AWARENSS MONTH!
Get the Mammogram! Early detection can save lives. It’s the easiest thing you can do each year. Your family, friends and more love you.